The Lying Idiot Running for Senate in Georgia

Bill Maher absolutely roasted Georgia Senate candidate Herschel Walker on his show.  As it turns out, the former All-Pro running back from the University of Georgia is a complete dumb-ass.  See if you can tell which of the follow Walker quotes are real, and which are fake:

A. "Everybody knows that flowers can't have sex.  So they make bees carry their load to the sexiest sunflower and bust a nut in its face."

B. "Since we don't control the air, our good air decided to float over to China's bad air, so when China gets our good air, their bad air got to move.  So it moves over to our good air space.  Then, now, we got to clean that back up."

C. "Yes, time travel is possible-- but you can only go in one way, into the future, and you can only do it one second at a time."

D. "At one time, science said man came from apes, did it not?  If that is true, why are there still apes?  Think about it."

E. "Anyone who thinks the earth is flat hasn't seen a mountain."

F. "Fossils . . . these are the remains of animals from a long time ago who died after turning into a rock."

G. "It can take u to six days after sex for the sperm and the egg to join up and start a baby, which gives the guy time to get away.  Think about it."

As it turns out, Walker is also a blatant liar.  He’s also absolutely godawful at it.

His deceptions seem to arrive in the news pre-collapsed—they are easily uncovered and incredibly numerous; his falsehoods have been repeatedly revealed over the last several months. At this point the “False Statements” section of his Wikipedia page is longer than the one recounting his ongoing campaign to be Georgia’s next senator. 

Walker has depicted himself as a successful entrepreneur and a worthy voice for Georgia’s business community. But Walker has drastically inflated his success as a businessman over a period of decades while also obscuring a tidy number of disasters. He has described himself as the proprietor of a food service business that he compared to a “mini–Tyson Foods,” claiming that it employed more than 100 people across several plants and brought in nearly $100 million in sales. According to The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, the reality was very different: The company’s profits were less than $2 million; Walker meanwhile had simply licensed his name to the business. In documentation relating to  his Paycheck Protection Program loan, it was revealed it had only eight employees.  

Earlier this year, Walker boasted that “I still have about 250 people that sew drapery and bedspreads for me.”  Impressive, except for the fact that it isn't true.  While Walker has claimed on his website that “[Herschel Walker Enterprises] and Renaissance Hospitality provides major hotels, restaurants and hospitals with custom fabric bedding, drapery and window treatments,” the truth is that Renaissance Hospitality doesn’t exist anymore—it dissolved a year ago. Moreover, Walker didn’t even own the business—a friend did.  

Last month, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution revealed that Walker had, on several occasions, claimed he worked in law enforcement despite the fact that he had no such experience. In 2013, he told a group of people at a suicide prevention event that he had “worked in law enforcement, so I had a gun. I put this gun in my holster, and I said, ‘I’m gonna kill this dude.’” In 2017 he said, “I’ve been in criminal justice all my life.” Two years later he told a group of soldiers, “I spent time at Quantico at the FBI training school. Y’all didn’t know I was an agent?” There was, yet again, just one problem: Walker had never worked in law enforcement; while his campaign claims he did attend a one-week training course at Quantico, that doesn’t make you an “agent.” Walker just … made all of that up. 

Throughout his political career, Walker has complained about single-parent families in the Black community. In 2021, when speaking to a right-wing group, he lamented how often a Black father would leave a family saying, “He leaves the boys alone so they’ll be raised by their mom,” he said. “If you have a child with a woman, even if you have to leave that woman—even if you have to leave that woman—you don’t leave that child.”  An admirable sentiment, except that Walker doesn't really believe it.  The Daily Beast recently revealed that Walker has a son, now 10 years old, whom he doesn’t see.  After their initial story was published, the Daily Beast tripled the number of children for whom Walker is an absentee father.

As entertaining as it is to watch Walker continually shoot himself in the foot, it’s still no fun watching voters have to stomach this sort of stupidity and deceit.