Carly Simon - Howl

Bezos' Next Project: Ruin Soccer

Wouldn’t it be cool if Jeff Bezos bought a soccer team and it was just like Amazon: a gross, predatory monopoly that routinely harms its workers?

Or what about The Washington Post, where Bezos took one of the most well-respected news outlets and turned it into MAGA garbage? Or maybe Blue Origin, where Bezos pumped in $2 billion of his own money, which was not nearly enough, and, uh, things exploded?

Well get ready, because Bezos seems ready to buy a roughly one-third stake in the Liverpool Football Club. Yes, this is a celebrated club in England and one of the most successful of all time, but what could go wrong by selling it to a bunch of billionaires? 

Bezos is partnering with Amit Bhatia, the son of some steel billionaire, and Eduardo Saverin, who co-founded Facebook and (after getting super rich) renounced his U.S. citizenship so he wouldn’t have to pay taxes on his massive wealth. Real great guys. 

Spirit of Shankly, the Liverpool supporters’ union, is worried—and why shouldn’t they be? Bezos has no background in operating a soccer club or any other sports team, but like all billionaires, he’s convinced he can do it all.

Billionaires are gobbling up soccer teams left and right. Saudi Arabia used its sovereign wealth fund to eat Newcastle United five years ago, and Qatar Sports Investment bought Paris Saint-Germain in 2012.

And, of course, sucking up to billionaires is the priority for FIFA President Gianni Infantino, who was recently thwarted in his secret plans to sell off the World Cup to, among others, Joshua Kushner. Yes, that’s President Donald Trump’s son-in-law Jared’s brother.

 

Deadly Reminder Football Season is Upon Us

A high school football player in Arkansas had every right to be rattled after finding a venomous snake inside his helmet during practice. The Maumelle High student felt unusual movement inside his headgear following warmups last week and brought his helmet to an assistant coach for inspection. A slithering 2-foot cottonmouth was discovered behind some padding.

The pit viper was so reluctant to exit the helmet that animal control officers had to submerge the helmet in water and forced the snake out, grabbing it with tongs. Animal services technicians identified the snake as a deadly cottonmouth. It was released in a wooded area.  Cottonmouths are the second-most venomous snakes found in Arkansas.

Animal services director Chris Davis said the player wore the helmet for nearly an hour and was fortunate he wasn’t bitten. “It was unreal,” Davis said. “You had to kind of be there and take pictures to say this was real.”  The player grabbed a different helmet and continued practice. But the situation caused the head coach to reiterate to his team that players should examine their equipment carefully before using it, checking for insects — or maybe something larger and more dangerous.

 

Secret Service Uses Journalists as Bait for Potential Iranian Attack on Air Force One

Due to a security threat, convicted felon Donald Trump secretly swapped planes while in Turkey for the NATO summit last month. Unbeknownst to anyone at the time, the entire switch may have been caught on camera. John Hudson, one of The Washington Post reporters who broke the story, shared footage on X that showed the moment the Orange Man boarded Air Force One and exited out the back onto a catering truck, which carried him over to a military plane several hundred feet away.

Trump boarding Air Force One while catering truck is waiting in back

Six minutes later, catering truck (with Trump inside) moves off towards the C-32A military aircraft

 

Catering truck pulls up in front of the staircase at the rear of the C-32A military aircraft

 

Trump boarded the older Air Force One plane from the front, but almost immediately walked into then catering truck container, which was elevated on the opposite side of the plane. Once hidden in the container, Trump was taken across the tarmac to a waiting U.S. military C-32A aircraft.

The press remained on the Air Force One plane, unaware that the president had left. Even many of his staff were not informed. It is rumored that Whiskey Pete Hegseth was in on the ruse (and switched planes to protect his own ass) while Secretary of State Marco Rubio and Secretary of Treasury Scott Bessent were left in the dark and remained in danger on Air Force One.  Upon arrival in the United Kingdom, Trump (once again, in secret) returned to the legacy Air Force One and exited as if he had been aboard the plane for the entire flight.

 

Meanwhile, Back at the Office

 

Social Media on Fire Over New Trump Toupee

Shaboozey & Leon Bridges - Burn It Down