The Week That Was: 2/25/08

Huck Fuckabee: Huckabee rolls on.  The presumptive GOP nominee tells the former governor to quit McRaining on his parade.

Brad Renfro'd: Another young actor drugs his way to the great beyond.

Sexual Predator Assaults the Vault: Rapist scratches a different itch and hits it big. Look at it this way-- at least now he'll be able to hire a hooker to get his kinks instead of preying on innocents.

No Frills Mills: Modern-day Yoko Ono decides to represent herself in her divorce. Legal experts say she doesn't have a leg to stand on.

You're Gonna Need A Bigger Coffin: Film actor Roy Scheider is dead at 75-- "Jaws" was the first time I had the shit scared out of me at the theater.

The War Of The Words Against the Empire Of The Yuan: Spielberg tells the Chinese to fuck off, and that they should do more to end the crisis in Darfur. Yeah, yeah-- Bush should do more too, but he's wasted all our political capital on Iraq and we gave up expecting anything from him long ago.

A Swing And A Miss: Clemens and his former trainer contradicted each other in congressional testimony this week. The former pitcher doesn't have credibility on his side, and could soon be under investigation for perjury.

Pardon My Husband: Hillary's handling of her husband's terrorist pardons back in 2000 may come back and haunt her. The WSJ had an interesting op-ed on the topic this week.

Scribes Scratch Strike: Hollywood writers are going back to work, with many of the shows returning with shortened seasons in about 4-6 weeks. Couch potatoes who were starting to lose weight can breath easier and look forward to packing the pounds back on. "Lost" is being shortened to a 13-ep season (to end on May 22) and "24" being postponed to 2009 altogether.

Chavez The Chicken: Hugo backs down on his threat to cut off U.S. oil supplies and decides to pick on a smaller target-- cutting off sales to Exxon. The sound you don't hear is Exxon not trembling in its boots.

At The Movies: A lot of crap at the multiplex this weekend-- "Spiderwick Chronicles" (Bites); "Definitely, Maybe" (Definitely, not); "Step Up 2" (Step away from the ticket window). The Daily Dude's best bet is "Jumper", which is being dumped on by the critics-- but it might have some cool effects, and it does star Samuel Jackson, so there might be some decent highlights.