This one's a bit old, but I can't resist passing it along after reading the "Purina Pensioner" story. The sordid tale of Svetlana the lonely housewife starts out as paramedics arrive on the scene of a suspect rape incident.
Upon responding to an emergency call, they find poor Svetlana, who is suffering from unexpected bleeding. The woman's friend, who is apparently too freaked out to provide details, accompanies her friend to the hospital. ER doctors stitch up several lacerations to the woman's vagina, believing that she is the victim of a sex maniac. How wrong they would turn out to be.
When Svetlana recovered, she confessed that she had been injured while having sex with her cat. It turned out that Svetlana's husband was out of town on business, and out of boredom, she decided to visit her friend Vera. The two women had some wine and started talking about intimate matters.
Vera then kicked the party into overdrive by suggesting that they try out a little feline friskiness. Svetlana, who was terrified at first, warmed to the idea after some more wine. "Life is too short, one has to try everything!" Svetlana decided, and Vera brought in her cat Timka.
Vera took her clothes off, turned the lights down low and put some porn in the VCR. She laid down, took a bottle of valerian and poured a little onto her vagina. When the cat smelled valerian, he started licking it away, putting Vera in the state of ecstasy. "Now it is your turn, you try," Vera told Svetlana when she was done.
But when tawdry Timka started licking valerian off of Svetlana, it seems an overdose kicked in-- all of a sudden he seized the genitals of the poor woman with his claws and teeth. Svetlana screamed and tried to push the fierce feline away from her, but the cat wouldn't let go. Vera quickly threw a bucket of water on the cat and chased it out of the house.
Post script to the story: Svetlana's husband couldn't stand playing second fiddle to a cat and he divorced her.
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